I can’t tell if Marley is a hugger?🤣 @Kinship has a great article which actually shows Marley is an exception! Check out the full article at the link in my bio kinshippartner Golden Retriever Life

If you’ve ever met a Golden Retriever, you probably assume they love hugs. After all, these dogs are famous for their affectionate nature, wagging tails, and endless enthusiasm for human company. But then there’s Marley. And let me tell you, Marley is an enigma.

From the day I met him, I thought I had hit the jackpot. A big, fluffy Golden with warm, soulful eyes—surely, he would be the ultimate snuggle buddy. But no, Marley operates on his own set of rules. One moment, he’s leaning into me, pressing his golden coat against my legs as if he can’t get enough of me. The next moment, I reach out for a hug, and he scampers away like I’ve just asked him to do calculus.

So, is Marley a hugger? I honestly can’t tell!

The Mystery of the Almost-Hug

Marley is full of contradictions. If I sit on the couch, he jumps up next to me and flops dramatically onto my lap. He’ll nuzzle into my neck, sigh like he’s had the hardest day of his life, and stay there for ages. But if I dare to wrap my arms around him, he stiffens.

It’s as if he’s saying, ā€œWhoa, whoa, let’s not label this. We’re just two pals hanging out.ā€

Sometimes, I test the waters. I’ll slowly bring my arms around him while we’re watching TV. If I move too quickly, he’s gone before I even get a chance. If I go slow, he might tolerate it for a second before squirming away. The confusion is real.

The Science of Dog Hugs

I started wondering—maybe Marley isn’t as weird as I think. Maybe some dogs just don’t like hugs. That’s when I stumbled upon a great article by Kinship, and guess what? It turns out Marley is actually the exception!

Most Golden Retrievers are famous for their love of physical affection. Research shows that many dogs lean into their humans for comfort and connection. They crave that touch. But some dogs, even the cuddliest-looking ones, aren’t fans of full-on hugs.

According to the article, dogs have different ways of showing affection, and hugging isn’t always one of them. While some dogs enjoy it, others find it restrictive. It makes sense—dogs instinctively prefer side-to-side contact rather than full-on embrace. For them, wrapping arms around their body can feel like being trapped.

So, Marley isn’t rejecting my love; he’s just showing it in his own way.

Marley’s Unique Love Language

I decided to pay more attention to how Marley expresses his affection. Instead of forcing hugs on him, I started watching for his own signals. And let me tell you, this dog has a love language all his own.

  1. The Full-Body Lean – Instead of hugging, Marley prefers leaning against me with all his weight. If I’m standing, he’ll press his side into my legs, sometimes almost knocking me over. If I’m sitting, he’ll drape himself across my lap like a 70-pound blanket. It’s his way of saying, ā€œI’m here. I trust you.ā€
  2. The Head Rest – If Marley really loves you, he’ll rest his head on your knee or shoulder. It’s subtle, but it means everything.
  3. The Paw Tap – Sometimes, when I stop petting him, Marley will lift his paw and place it gently on my arm. It’s his polite way of asking, ā€œExcuse me, why did you stop?ā€
  4. The Zoomie Surprise – After a long day, Marley sometimes explodes into joyful zoomies, running in circles around me. It’s his way of saying, ā€œI’m happy you’re here.ā€
  5. The Tail Wag That Moves His Whole Body – Nothing says ā€œI love youā€ more than the full-body wag, where his tail moves so enthusiastically that his whole backside joins in.

Learning to Love on His Terms

Understanding Marley has been a journey. I used to feel disappointed when he dodged my hugs, but now I get it. He’s not being standoffish—he’s just showing affection in his own way.

Instead of wrapping my arms around him, I lean into him when he initiates contact. Instead of forcing cuddles, I let him come to me. And when he plops down with his head resting on my leg, I know I’ve won his heart.

Marley has taught me that love isn’t about what we want—it’s about understanding and respecting each other’s boundaries. And honestly, isn’t that what true companionship is all about?

The Final Verdict

So, is Marley a hugger? The answer is… kind of? He’s not a hugger in the traditional sense, but he’s incredibly loving in his own way.

If you’ve ever had a dog that doesn’t love hugs, don’t take it personally. They might just have their own special way of showing affection. If you want to learn more about dogs and their unique personalities, I highly recommend checking out the full article from Kinship—it’s linked in my bio!

In the meantime, I’ll be here, waiting for the day Marley surprises me with an actual hug. Until then, I’ll settle for his goofy lean-ins and tail wags. Because at the end of the day, love is love—whether it comes in the form of a hug or a head tilt.